Life’s Messy

For a little over two months I’ve been, let’s say, unwell. At first I was actually sick. For about five or six days. And then the fog and exhaustion took over.

I’ve been running on autopilot for the entire time. Barely functional. So tired and so breathless all of the time. Unable to seem to get motivated and just dragging my hind end around. I’ve still been making pieces and taking orders but I’ve been very much depleted.

I’m pretty isolated so when I got sick I didn’t get a Covid test and as the time went by I wondered if I perhaps should have. I’ve been extremely careful since the pandemic began about sanitary packaging methods and I’ve been diagnosed with mild OCD since I was 18, so nothing really changed. Except after packing up orders and getting them to the mailbox, I’d often go back to bed. Sleep until noon or 2:00 pm.

I’ve had insomnia since very early childhood and have functioned as an adult on 3-5 hours of sleep a day. Until March of 2020, when I suspect I acquired Covid from an emergency vet visit, before testing was available here and before things got wild. Then I’d sleep for 5-7 hours a day. A little nap around 2 in the afternoon. This though. 12-16 hours a day. Holy moly. Just wild.

Yesterday though. I begin to hope whatever hot mess I’ve gotten myself into has begun to abate. A regular sleep of sorts. I’m still not back up to full tilt but I feel like there’s a hint of hope in the air. I have worked the last two days.

My messy wheel after a day of throwing and trimming.

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